Archive for August, 2011

at capacity

“No matter how many kids you have, it feels like you’re at capacity.”

When I heard this a week ago I skimmed it and remembered soon after I had Darla and was pacing the floor in the evening hoping that the screaming would stop.  I thought, How will I have more children and be able to do this again?  She was the most high maintenance of my babies and I was learning that I do not do well on less than 8 hrs of sleep.  Yet I knew I didn’t want her to be an only child so out of determination more than anything, I vowed to do it again anyway. Read the rest of this entry

Crystalized Moments

This summer has been nothing of what I imagined.  I thought we’d spend a lot of time at camps with S., but the weather was lousy through July and I stayed home instead of sitting in the rain with four little ones.  We thought we were moving…and then decided to rent the same house from new owners.  We hoped to take a late vacation…but are now committing to doing a “homeschool school” that starts in less than two weeks.

Thankfully, even in the midst of a disappointing summer we experienced some crystalized moments.  When S. and I were dating we started calling those moments where the world seems to pause and your mind wants to freeze frame the happenings around you “crystalized moments”.

Here are a couple of my summer’s crystalized moments (at least the ones caught on film).

Sister loving.  Having my own sister who I adore, protect, and call daily (who am I kidding- who I call hourly) causes me to have a heightened excitement for these two sisters:

Read the rest of this entry

The anticlimactic conclusion

We sold our house!  Ironically it closed only days after the first deal (which fell through) was supposed to close.  I’ve been marking rentals for months and realized as we neared closing that most the houses we had our eye on were no longer for rent.  I spent a week combing through every craigslist ad, calling people with vacant houses for sale and asked if they’d like to rent, and went for half a dozen drives.

Every lead ran into dead ends.  We prayed for God to work out the right place for us and apparently the right place is here.  Next spring we’ll give it another try.  The new owners live a few doors down and are friends of ours.  We’re blessed that they were willing to rent to us for the year.

So…that’s my anticlimactic ending to three years of having our house for sale off and on!

11 years

And it’s one of those things where I think, how can we have really already been married for eleven years?!  Then I think back on all that has happened in those eleven years and I think, Sheesh- has it really only been eleven years?!

 

Die, Wisteria. Die.

There is a passage in Isaiah that initially made me want to kick the Israelites.  On closer examination, it made me want to kick myself.

In Isaiah 30:15-16 God gives the secret to rest and internal peace.  “In returning and rest you shall be saved; in quietness and confidence shall be your strength.”  But you would not, and you said, “No, for we will flee on horses”- Therefore you shall flee!  And, “We will ride on swift horses“- Therefore those who pursue you shall be swift!”

The Israelites were looking to Egypt for their security and strength.  It made sense politically,  It made sense on a rational, strategic level.  God was telling them that their peace would never be found in another nation- regardless how strong they are.  The only way to be saved and have rest is to return to God and let Him be their strength.

Nearly four years ago my husband hit a wall.  And then he hit the floor- literally.  The perfect storm had been brewing: a busy ministry, expectations from others that were raised each time some were met, some painful confrontations and hard staff decisions, working 60 hour weeks and still treading water, and then the looming September which would only bring more intensity. Read the rest of this entry

Little Girly

Thank you to everyone who keeps asking about Little Girly.  It will most likely be January before we have much of an idea what her long term plan might look like.  Much like every area of our lives, we are learning to not wish we knew what the future holds and instead ask the Lord what obedience today looks like.  That is just fine with me because today looks like endlessly kissing those chubby cheeks, cheering for our new crawler, praying blessings and God’s promises over a sweet smelling girl as we tuck her in, and laughing at some outrageous squeals and giggles.  Ahhhh…this is the life.

Cherry Valley

In spite of my protests, kicking, and screaming, when I was in the fifth grade my family moved from the Seattle area to southwest WA.  After renting for a few months my parents began house hunting.

Then we found IT.  The Tadema family dream house.  We called it Cherry Valley and when you stepped on the property you could almost forget that downtown was right down the road.  The house itself needed work, but my parents enjoy a project.  Us kids picked which rooms we wanted for ourselves and dreamed about how to make the quirks work for our family.  We were certain this was God’s will for us.  It was big, had climbing trees and property.  Anxious to get out of the rental that smelled as though the previous owner’s cat never learned how to use the litter box, we set our plans. Read the rest of this entry